Thursday 2 February 2012

Worry worry worry and yet more worry!

There's not a great deal that worries me, well, there's one thing that worries me more than anything else, Alzheimer's. See my mum was diagnosed with this around 2000, shes still with us, but, now I don't want this to sound nasty, shes not mum anymore. I would much rather remember her how she was, bubbly, happy, carefree and above all a caring mum to me and my brother.
She had her retirement snatched from her, missing out on grandchildren, days in the summer not needing to work, relaxing in the garden, days out with the family, maybe even a trip abroad to see number two son, who knows.
I have, at times an awful memory, and at other times I remember stuff I was convinced I'd forget. We all forget stuff, but when Alzheimer's is in the back of your mind every time you forget it gets magnified 10 fold. I try to convince myself that I have no worse memory than the next bloke, but never quite convince myself, sad really.
Now when I say it worries me, it don't worry me to the point that its always there at the forefront of my thoughts, its not, but its one of those thoughts that don't take much to bring it to the front.
Still, that's enough of that, its all a bit sad, and I'm sure at the start of my blog I said I would try to inject a little humour, so far so bad on that score!
What about the non smoking? I hear you cry, well, what about the smoking We are both still off them, the last few days have been really good, not given much thought to it. Me and Sam do chat about it sometimes, but now its usually about how much easier it would be to keep going, how far we have come, and put our cravings through. It really would be stupid to go back to it, but I've been stupid in the past, so it ain't over by any stretch of the imagination and we both know that.
I hope you are enjoying my little updates, I'm quite enjoying doing it, so I will try to keep it up.

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