I will miss you mate

Got in from work this evening to be told one of my oldest friends had died overnight. 48 years old, a real loss, we may not have seen each other as much as we did but he was the most consistent friend anyone could want. If I needed something or he needed a lift somewhere we could rely on each other. Friends don't need to see each other all the time, actually if you don't see much of them but can still rely on them it means more. He was one of the longest surviving kidney transplant patients and had a really rough time recently but always seemed to face up to it.
Fortunately he had a great family around him, a loving and caring family who he always defended to the bitter end.
I will miss Alan, I will really miss him.
He was outspoken, and would quite happily give as good as he got to whoever needed telling.
One of the funny things about Al was just how crap he was at spelling, he didn't care, he knew what he wanted to say, and you could usually read what he typed, but if you couldn't tell he didn't care. I only hope, and I'm sure his mum won't mind this tongue in cheek comment, he didn't make up his own plaque, for the headstone.

Keep reading its not really football

When I looked back I did think at one time that I didn’t have much as a kid, but now, with the advent of eBay I realise that maybe I didn’t do so bad.

Some folk say that a smell can remind you of things that happened in the past, and it really can; but to me nothing brings memories of my childhood flooding back quite like the sight of a Kevin Hector football card, not because I support Derby County now, or did in the past, he was just a name I plucked from the air, I could have said, Peter Story or Ron Harris, all great footballers in their time, all of who I can still see staring back at me from a collector’s card.

The one thing that I remember, no matter which player it was, was the smell of the bubble gum that was inside the pack. A waffle thin slice of gum that had an odour all of its own, it smelt, if possible, of the 70s, of childhood, and went stale in a matter of minutes, rock hard and flavourless, but it was great.

I look on eBay now, just surfing through and filling my watch list up with stuff I hardly ever buy, but could if I wanted to, and I realise just how much I did have as a child.

Games such as Airfix Flight deck, escape from Colditz, Mastermind and Subbuteo are all games I had in my youth, and have since bought again, and, as is my way, sold on again. I find it amazing that I cannot remember what happened to the originals; did Mum throw them in the bin or did I swap them, and if i swapped them, what did I swap them for, and what happened to that?

I can remember many a football season was spent sitting on my door step with a bunch of mates swapping football cards, ‘got, got, got, ain't got, got, got was usually how the swap conversation started. I don’t remember having an album for the cards, not like the paper cards that you licked the top 1/4 inch of, and stuck them in an album, no, these cards where bigger than the paper ones, and actually made of card, they where made by A&BC, search eBay for them.

There are lots of resources on the Internet allowing us to see what we missed out on, or lost as happened in a lot of cases, I've spent many a happy hour looking back, its almost like virtual time travel.

We didn’t have computers in them days, wow, suddenly I sound old, no, we had to make our own fun, I've told my kids that and it bought a little smile to my face, a proper parents saying. I must have spent about 10 hours a day on our local green playing football with my mates. I can remember as soon as the final whistle went on FA Cup final day we would meet up on the green and all tell each other what player we would be. I was a goalkeeper at the time, and remaned one for the rest of my playing days, and for some reason I liked Kevin Keelan, he played for Norwich City and I would usually be him, not that they had any FA Cup success at all.

We played Cricket sometimes, but not that often, football was an 11 month a year sport for us, but, when we did play Cricket it wasn’t for long; the green you see was big enough for a good game of football, but Cricket, nah, a little on the small side. So after a couple of hours, and 5 or 6 trips to different neighbours houses to ask for the ball back it was stumps, and the big ball came out again.

We played, as I have said, on a green, unfortunately for me, it was only a goal kick from my house. Sometimes, well most of the time, the language got a little fruity, we may have been between 13 and 16 but that didnt stop our mum or dad giving us a clip round the ear, I think it used to be called having respect for grownups, something thats lacking today. I remember one occasion in particular when I called someone a really nasty name, I could type it here but whats the point, but if you need to know, it rhymed with Billy Hunt, within 2 minutes my mum was at the entrance to our square, “Oi Mick your mums over there”, off I’d trudge, head down, looking as guilty as sin, it weren’t me, I didn’t swear.

“What makes you think I’ve come down here about you swearing”?

Bugger I’d think, dropped myself right in it without any need, I went back and got my ball, usually to shouts from my mates asking to borrow it, and see you after your tea Mick.

 Won’t be out any more today, I'm grounded, bring it back when you’re done will ya!

Gary Sobers was my uncle

1968-1970

One thing I remember from my very early days in London, but not with any sort of vividness, is playing cricket and football in the road with my friends, only one of whose names I can remember. He was called Chester, he was a few years older than me, and I should think he was about 10 or 11 when I was 5 or 6. He lived at the end of our road, we lived more in the middle.

I remember Chester telling me once that his Uncle was Sir Garfield Sobers, the great West Indian cricketer, did I believe him? Yeah of course I did, I was only about 6. I probably told my dad at the time, who, like I would now if confronted with such a tale, probably raised a knowing eyebrow. Do I still believe him now, yeah, of course I do, I’m only 48. I never saw him again when we moved to Suffolk, some things about the move where not for the good.

Telling me about his Uncle must have made quite an impression on me though, as I have never forgotten the impression he must have made on me.

There were obviously a few other people in our street that I knew but I’m buggered if I can remember their names, should have made notes.

As you can imagine, even in London, the streets would have been far less busy than today with traffic, I can’t actually remember being disturbed by traffic at all in those days.

I have a few photos of the time I lived in London, some of me playing, in the garden by myself, makes me wonder if any of the other kids did actually exist or if I made them up.

Not to sure whats going on in this photo, it was a shared garden so I'm either trying to escape, or spying on the people behind, but, as you can see, I'm alone.

The sweet smell of...........everything, within reason!

Four weeks today, since we quit smoking, how well do we think we are doing, well, very well thanks,
I work with a bloke who gave up smoking over a year ago, December 2010 I think it was; well while we was at work the other night he took time out from his job to inform me, out of the blue, that 'this is great weather to smoke in', random! Great weather to smoke in? Whats that all about, it was bloody freezing. 'Warms the cockles' he followed the first remark with. Firstly, what the hell are your cockles, and secondly, how will smoking warm them, where ever they may be?
I love comments like that, things that don't seem to have anything to do with the thing they are describing, like warming your cockles. another that I like, that is really bizarre is, I'm not as green as I'm cabbage looking. Which means something along the lines of, how stupid do you think I am, or I'm not that stupid really, where did that come from?
Ok, back the not smoking. After my mate said that comment about being great weather for smoking he really set me off wanting a smoke, I didnt give in I hasten to add, but it was the closest I'd been for a while. I do still get cravings, not every day, but maybe every other day, just a quick moment of weakness. They last a few seconds, no longer than that, and then they go and life with out the evil weed goes on as normal agian.
Still walking everywhere, but its great, being able to breath easy whilst walking, not coughing and whezing when I reach my destination for the first time in years, makes giving up smoking worth it. Im not saying for one minute that the air where I live is alpine fresh, not green vally pure, but it seems cleaner now than it did before. The sense of smell is also returning, which at times is not great, especially when cleaning up after the dog (quick, pass a cigarette) but a lot of the time it is wondeful. Walking past a bakers is great, or a coffee shop, I love the smell of a coffee shop, well, I do now I know they actually smell nice.
Ok, I'm off for a coffee and fresh cake now, will update soon.

Whats that old man?

Took a stroll into town with my daughter this morning and on the way was telling her about my childhood, the sort of things we got up to, what the town looked like in the early 70s, and such like.
I said to her how great it was to have a childhood then, rather than now, when it seems to me, and it is only my opinion, that the kids now just cant make their own amusement. Obviously she disagreed, and that is perfectly understandable, its all about opinions, but she is wrong.
She did seem interested in listening to the old mans tales and said that maybe I should write about them. I told her that I could put some of it on my blog; I don't want my entire life story to flood out, that would be dull, nope, just the years between about 9 and 15, the blunder years! I will go back to my earliest memories from this age range, there's no point going to much earlier because if you go back to far I don't think its that easy to remember stuff. Now if I do remember things from my days as a child in London then I will tell.
It will only be the odd event I put on here, I wont make the blog into a life story, I will still update the none smoking, It does amuse me that I type this stuff like there are people out there who give a toss about it.
Still off the cigarettes, over 3 weeks now, still going well. I had a moment today though, where I thought how easy it would be to start again, the feeling of the first smoke of the day, or how the first cigarettes will be after having not smoked for a while, it would be great.
Right, I'm off to reminisce about my early years, now, where did I put those rose tinted spectacles?

Whats that coming over the hill is it the taxman!

Three weeks today, of not smoking, I think we have done well. It was the case a week or so a go that when I was on my four days off it was really tough to get through without a lot of cravings, but not anymore it would seem. It really does seem to be getting easier.
Now and again you see something in the news which just gets you angry, we all do it I'm sure, well today I saw something which made my blood boil.
It seems that football teams can, if they so wish, totally ignore any tax bill that needs paying. Rangers FC in the SPL owe the taxman around £49million, it begs the question, how? What did the tax bill do, creep up on them? How can a company possibly owe the taxman that much money and still be trading. If it was a high street company they would have been wound up long ago. If you or me owe the taxman any amount of money, you would be in court, followed very closely by prison.
Just have another look at the amount Ranger FC owe again, £49million, not £4.9million, or £.49million, no, £49million, and the figure could be higher. It also turns out, according to Sky sports news that since the new owner bought the club last year they owe £9million in unpaid tax. Obviously these figures are all based on what i see and hear on the TV and radio.
So, what happens now, well from what I can tell, they now go to court and come to an agreement with their creditors, HMRC included, and offer them a certain amount in the pound, so we as tax payers bail out a team we have no allegiance with.
This government we have tell us daily that they are intent on clawing back unpaid tax, overpaid benefits and other monies that are owed by us, but seem to be allowing these football teams to just flout the tax law when they like.
Portsmouth FC are also looking to enter administration for the 2nd time, again for unpaid tax, how can that be the case. Surely when they went into administration the first time the agreement should have been reached to repay at a reduced amount, miss it and go under, or not. Miss it and just go back to court and agree again to pay a reduced amount.
I also noticed with regard Rangers FC that the extra punishment they will receive will be a 10 point penalty taking them from 2nd in the SPL all the way down to, erm, 2nd, wow, some punishment. Portsmouth's 10 point penalty takes them in to the scrap for relegation.
I love football, but I also hate having to bail out banks and football teams, because, if they don't pay we have to pay more, it stands to reason. As I say, I love football, but lets just let one of these teams just go to the wall. I know that would upset a lot of supporters, and I really would feel for them, but come on, it cant continue, can it?

It's all gone Pete wrong

It ain't really gone wrong, I just thought that was an amusing title for this post. It popped into my head and I had a little chuckle to myself, maybe I should hit the odd wrong key just to give the effect of shaking every now and again with laughter, or maybe not.
I think, all things considered, that I've managed to keep my spirits quite high during the none smoking. You hear people moaning and getting cross, then blame the fact that they have stopped smoking, its just an excuse, but, I suppose that if it helps you give up then stay miserable, power to the grump!
You also get told about all sorts of nasty stuff when you give up, like chest infections. Fortunately both me and Sam have managed to avoid this ailment. I feel absolutely fine, famous last words, here comes the worst chest infection ever known to mankind. As we have spent the last 2 and a half months without a car, it broke, we have been walking everywhere, and its been fine. As a car driver for a good few years the thought of walking anywhere becomes an alien concept, and is quickly banished from the mind, nah, it will be quicker in the car! Being without the car also saves more money than just petrol and insurance, we are now not spending silly little amounts of money by popping up to Tesco (other supermarkets are available) to get small treats to eat in the evenings. No longer are we making spur of the moment trips out for crisps and sweets. Don't get me wrong, we can still get sweets but we need to walk to our local Co-op, see bracketed comment above, where they are slightly more expensive.
The only giving up stereotype that we are suffering from is the eating more, or wanting to eat more, so I should imagine that given a month or two we could both end up looking a little larger than we do now, give up smoking first, clear that hurdle then tackle the weight issues.
Non smoking wise we are now on day 17, I would really like to think that we wont go back but never say never when it comes to giving up smoking, it can, and does, just sneak up on you and hit you with a mega craving when you least expect it, just stick to with it, we can, and will win.

A smoke, a smoke, my kingdom for a smoke, no thanks, I've given up

Yesterday, Tuesday, was two weeks since we quit smoking. It's actually been a good journey all things considered. We've had the odd bad moment, well, more than a moment in reality, more along the lines of an hour or so now and again. If you can fight through the tough hour or so you can win the battle. Ignore the hour and you get a good while before it comes back.
Sam's doing really well, being stuck at home, been keeping herself mega busy with house work.
I never really think about smoking at work, at all, it's the easiest time I've found. It's when I'm on my four days off that it's harder, more time to think about it I should imagine.
I actually met someone today who has been reading this blog, and he looked quite normal as well, I'll check again in a month with a sanity update.
Football tonight, Middlesbrough vs Sunderland, FA Cup replay, red and white army, but which red n white army are you on about man? Sunderland of course.

Can't see the wood for the snow

Snows here, knee deep in the stuff we are, sounded like Yoda then I did!
Now I know its nowhere near as bad as it can get over in Whyseverythingwhite Saskatchewan but nonetheless its still enough to bring the country to its knees, again, you would think we'd learn but alas no.
Looks nice though.

Sam don't cope with the snow at all, a fall, over, not of snow, a couple of years ago turned her right off, so now its up to me and the kids to walk Indy, poor Indy, she may put on a pound or two. We are all hoping that it will be gone in a day or so, we shall see.
After snow fall when we take Indy out she has the habit of running the side of her face through the snow for a couple of feet, sometimes completely burying her head, not sure why but she enjoys it. I'm just a little afraid that she will resurface with another dogs, erm, poo up the side of her head, I ain't cleaning it off, its bad enough picking hers up without mopping our dogs face down removing someone Else's.

Still not smoking, DAY12, been a good day today, not really thought about it, and Sam's doing well to considering shes been stuck in all day, clever girl. Two days off two weeks, its gone really quick all things considered.
We was going Geocaching today, but, as I find it tough enough when the ground is clear I had no hope with 5 inches of snow also hiding the caches, having said that, we could have taken Indy she could have cleared the area with her face.
Had a bit of a crap day on eBay the other day, sold a phone as a buy it now, turns out the individual who bought it, well, said he'd buy it, just decided not to bother going through with the transaction, really need people like them don't we. Cant decide if I should name and shame him on here, I'll leave it another few days, once the unpaid dispute has been resolved, after all, he, or she cant deny it can they. I'll only give their eBay name though, not their full name and address, although I must admit I'd be tempted.

A trip with my son, and an insulted women

Woke this morning, at 10am, after the last night shift of this 4 only to be informed by Sam that shes struggling today, grim!
Four days off and it looks like the 'come on start again, you know you want to' devils have started. We knew it wouldn't be easy so we are ready for the battle, we have our lozenges, really awful tasting, we have our willpower and we have the fact that we have done a week and a half, so why go back now.
I, actually don't feel to bad as it happens, and Sam is still cheerful, so she's fighting back.
How does it feel today giving up? It feels a bit strange, you kind of know something is missing, but don't want to admit to it, after all the only things missing are, wheezing when you go for a walk, puffing and panting when you walk up stairs, spending quite a bit of money each month on stuff you set light to, and also, standing in the same place once every hour or so, ridicules.
Its really hard to describe the feeling of craving, but I think writing about it has helped us. Its like an overpowering urge to do something but telling yourself you must not give in, I suppose that's just a definition of craving, but its how it is. The feeling seems to remain strong but the time it lasts diminishes to a more controllable level.
When you crave a smoke the feeling is all in your head, but when you are hungry for something the feeling is in your stomach, its really weird.
Took a nice leisurely stroll into town with my son today, a rare treat indeed for me as a parent.
There was a stage where we almost threatened to break into a conversation, hard to believe I know, but as rare as hens teeth due to the fact that we hardly see him.
Went out to Pets at Home just now with the hound, managed to insult a women without even trying. It went along the lines of. She walked past me and Indy just as I was about to start talking to the dog (Indy).
Me, "I was just about to start talking to the dog but thought I should wait until you've gone by or I'll look mad".
Her "Who's mad, me?"
Me "No, me for wanting to talk to the dog".
Her "Oh, I thought you was talking to me"
Me, "No, if you was mad I wouldn't tell you anyway".
The feeling of, pass me the shovel I'm sure I can dig this hole a bloody site quicker with that flashed through my mind, fortunately she was a nice pleasant person, who took the unprovoked, unfounded and indeed unintended insult with good spirit, we said our goodbyes and I started my conversation with Indy, bliss.

Worry worry worry and yet more worry!

There's not a great deal that worries me, well, there's one thing that worries me more than anything else, Alzheimer's. See my mum was diagnosed with this around 2000, shes still with us, but, now I don't want this to sound nasty, shes not mum anymore. I would much rather remember her how she was, bubbly, happy, carefree and above all a caring mum to me and my brother.
She had her retirement snatched from her, missing out on grandchildren, days in the summer not needing to work, relaxing in the garden, days out with the family, maybe even a trip abroad to see number two son, who knows.
I have, at times an awful memory, and at other times I remember stuff I was convinced I'd forget. We all forget stuff, but when Alzheimer's is in the back of your mind every time you forget it gets magnified 10 fold. I try to convince myself that I have no worse memory than the next bloke, but never quite convince myself, sad really.
Now when I say it worries me, it don't worry me to the point that its always there at the forefront of my thoughts, its not, but its one of those thoughts that don't take much to bring it to the front.
Still, that's enough of that, its all a bit sad, and I'm sure at the start of my blog I said I would try to inject a little humour, so far so bad on that score!
What about the non smoking? I hear you cry, well, what about the smoking We are both still off them, the last few days have been really good, not given much thought to it. Me and Sam do chat about it sometimes, but now its usually about how much easier it would be to keep going, how far we have come, and put our cravings through. It really would be stupid to go back to it, but I've been stupid in the past, so it ain't over by any stretch of the imagination and we both know that.
I hope you are enjoying my little updates, I'm quite enjoying doing it, so I will try to keep it up.