And you are?

 Wow it’s been a while.

We have been decorating over the past year, new carpets, paint, wallpapering and suchlike, we also invested in new bedroom furniture. A nice new wardrobe, four doors and two full length mirrors, very posh.

Now at my age when nature calls you have very little choice but to say “yes sir, right away sir” and March off to the toilet like a good boy, even if it’s in the middle of the night. Last night was no exception to this rule, 3am and I’m suddenly, ahem, breaking my neck for a wee. 

Having laid there for a minute just to make absolutely sure I needed to go I fling my legs out of bed and stand, I still find it remarkable that the most comfortable you can be in bed is with a full bladder. Bleary eyed I start the dark walk towards the bedroom door. 

Now this wardrobe I mentioned earlier is in a different spot to the old ones, this one is just to the side of the bedroom door. For some reason I turned a bit wide at the end of our bed and headed for what I thought was the door. Ambient lighting from clocks and plugs illuminated the room just enough to see dark shapes a few feet in front. All of a sudden, not 6 inches in front of me I was confronted by another person, in our bedroom, at 3 o’clock in the morning, looking right at me. I nearly did my ablution there and then. Out of impulse, and because I was naked, I put my arms up and shoved this interloper in the chest, except it wasn’t their chest, no, it was the bloody mirror on the wardrobe, if I hadn’t secured it to the wall when we got it it probably would have rocked and fallen on me I pushed it that hard. The intruder, trespasser, would be assassin was merely my reflection. My heart still racing I did make it to the loo in time, just, chuckling but rather embarrassed. 

I find it truly amazing how many thoughts can race through your mind in a split second. Who are you? What are you doing in here? I’m naked you don’t need to see this, get out, god your a handsome bugger. (I may have made the last one up……maybe).

Anyway, as usual, thanks for taking the time to read this and if you enjoyed it you might like to look back at some of my other offerings from the past few years.