Friendly farts and snot bubbles

There comes a time as a bloke, in some friendships, when you cross over the threshold between being a friend and being a mate. Not so much with other blokes, it just kind of evolves there, I'm referring to women. You know that time has come when you are quite happy to fart in their presence, without the merest hint of embarrassment (on your part anyway). They are usually over the moon at this, as I'm sure you can imagine. Having an awful odor rushing up their bugle as a sign of friendship must seem a little strange from the outside, but it means your count them the same as you would another bloke, high praise indeed, and I am sure they appreciate this acceptance in to the world of the male.
Another thing came to me the other day. I was informed by someone that, whilst out walking, she blew an uncontrolled bubble of snot out of her nose. Yes snot, like a child would! She told me that to do this at her age was not right, making it sound that it was OK for me at my age to do it though. This made me ponder if there is an age, other than in your very early years, when it could be construed as socially acceptable to blow snot bubbles from your nose. I hope not, as I feel that over the course of time I have lost the ability to perform this skill, if indeed it is a skill. I think it must be, as it cant be a gift, as this would have stayed with me over the years, also, gift does not sound right.
 'I bestow upon you, young man, the ability to blow snot bubbles from your nasal orifice', nah, absolutely not a gift.

Forums smorums!

I did start a running specific blog, which, much to my displeasure was a little, ahem, serious. I don't do serious, if I can help it.

I tried advertising the said blog on a very well known running magazines forum Well, you'd thought I'd attempted to crap in their running shoes, or wipe my arse on their London Marathon finishers T-shirt.

It was going to be a way for me to tell of what I'd been up to, re- running, training, events and such like. I have decided to put it in this blog, providing it's amusing, well, to me anyway. 

I really couldn't believe how incredibly unhelpful or welcoming these "runners" could be. 

I was going to make an appointment at the doctors after, as I was sure I must have had some hideous ailment that was manifesting itself in my scribblings. 

Therefore, if you don't want to read this stuff don't blame me, blame the elitist folk in the forum, they didn't want me, so their loss as they say, is your gain. I can almost here the rapturous cheering and shouting from here. Oh joy, oh rapture.

If you want to go into this running magazines forum and let this mob of Gengis Khan runners know just what they are missing then please feel free. Don't go on there pleading for them to take me back, it won't work, they didn't feel the love.